Glossary

Bedder - Cambridge term for a cleaner who wakes you up every morning in the process of cleaning your room. It is thought that the only reason the college employs bedders is to keep an eye on the students to make sure they do not damage the college rooms or have any overnight visitors.

Bedsit - Student accommodation consisting of only one room. If you live in a bedsit you end up with your bed and chairs and desk in the same place, and your bed often gets used as a sofa by visitors, hence the name.

Cambridge University - Tourists are often confused when trying to find the university, because it is actually a conglomeration of colleges. The oldest was founded back in the fourteenth century, and the newest in the seventies. There are over thirty colleges in all.

Catz - A shorthand for Saint Catherine’s college, situated on Trumpington Street in the middle of town. King’s and Catz share a building, and the join between them forms the infamous ladder climb.

Degrade - The term used by Cambridge University to describe the action of dropping out of college for a year, usually due to reasons of bad health or nervous stress.

Ephedrine - A class C drug (legal to possess, but illegal to sell without a license or prescription) lying somewhere between caffeine and amphetamines in its effects. In the USA it is sold across the counter as an anti-histamine, decongestant, and keeping-awake-to-study aid (a bit like caffeine tablets are used by some here in Cambridge during exam time). Boots sell a substance called pseudo-ephedrine across the counter as a decongestant, which is a weakened version of ephedrine with worse side effects. Taking too many causes heart palpitations and scares the life out of you.

Exeat - To get your degree from Cambridge you have to 'keep term' - this means that you must live within three miles of Great St. Mary's church for at least 24 weeks in the year. Therefore, to leave town for more than a day, you have to get permission from the college. This permission is called an 'exeat'. Must undergraduates regard this as an anachronism, and just go as they please.

Fifth Week Blues - Cambridge terms are about eight weeks long, but very intense. As a result, around the time of the fifth week many people are physically and emotionally exhausted, and this results in a form of depression known as fifth week blues. It's kind of like the angst many working people feel on Wednesday or Thursday morning, but amplified many times.

Hall - 1) The Selwyn dining hall. 2) The process of having a meal there, hence expressions such as 'we'll meet up after hall.'

JCR - The Junior Combination Room. This is a common room for undergraduates, and contains a pool table, notice boards, daily newspapers, arcade games and snack machined. The postgraduates have a Middle Combination Room, and the fellows have the opulent and plush Senior Combination Room.

Kava Kava - A suspension of the ground-up root of the piper methysticum plant that has been used for centuries by the populations of the Polynesian islands in much the same way as alcohol is used in the west. Jon discovered that bottles of Kava Kava capsules could be bought in some of the health food stores in Cambridge, and the drug is now sometimes used as an alternative to beer or wine by the Night Climbing Society members.

King's - One of the older and more imposing colleges, founded by King Henry VI. It includes the magnificent King's chapel, and between it and St Catherine's college is the infamous ladder climb.

Kiwi - 1) A small antipodean flightless bird. 2) Selwyn College magazine written by and for the undergraduates. It comes out twice a term (once in the summer term). The college was founded in memory of the first New Zealand bishop, Augustus Selwyn, hence the name 'Kiwi'.

Ladder Climb - The name given to the climb between King’s and Catz, which consists of a series of protruding brick ridges leading to the top of the building. Although the climb looks simple it requires a good head for heights and strong fingers.

Michaelmas term - The first term of the Cambridge academic year, from October to December. The other two terms are the Lent term and the Summer term. If you think that 'Michaelmas' is a strange name for a term, consider the fact that on the 'other place' they call one of their terms 'Hillary'.

Night Climbing Society/Project - A nebulous and nefarious organisation of Cambridge undergraduate dedicated to climbing as many of the Cambridge University buildings as they safely can, whilst also enjoying life to the full through the medium of alcohol and by excessive socialising and partying.

Porter - An employee of a college who walks around wearing a suit and bowler hat, and fulfils the role of security guard, janitor, postmaster and receptionist. Porters spend most of their time in the porters lodge, and it is a good idea to keep on their good side as they have a lot of power in the college. They are the second greatest danger faced by the night climber. The greatest danger is, of course, falling.

Reality Checkpoint - A lamppost in the middle of Parker's Piece in the south of Cambridge, built in 1894. Legend has it that in 1974 a psychology lecturer from what was then Anglia Polytechnic instructed his students to paint the words 'Reality Checkpoint' on it in the early seventies as an indication that intoxicated students walking past were leaving the safe confines of the university and were heading into town. The lamppost was labelled with a brass plaque that appeared sometime in January 1998, but the plaque was prised off over the summer vacation. Que Sera Sarah calls the town beyond Reality Checkpoint the ‘Un-versity’.

Robinson - The most recently founded Cambridge college. It is a red brick fortress-like building in the shadows of the University Library, in the west of Cambridge.

Room Ballot - Every year in Selwyn the first years are put in Cripps court, and the second and third years are housed in rooms according to the room ballot. This is a list ordered randomly, with the person on the top of the list getting to choose their room first, and so on down to the last person who gets the worst room in college. In the third year this list is reversed, which gives the previous year's loser the room of their choice in their final year.

Selwyn - A Cambridge University college founded in the late nineteenth century, situated in the west of Cambridge. Many of the night climbers are at Selwyn.

Set - Student accommodation consisting of two rooms - a bedroom and a study. Probably short-hand for ‘set of rooms’.